A good night tonight but...

......I remained depressed for some reason. I think this is the alcohol. Its such a depressant. Even though things went really well tonight, I'm down on myself.

I went to an art gallery tonight and I had some great interaction with women today. They really responded to me when I looked at them. They responded almost instantly and I did the same. One came over to where I was looking at a piece of art and started talking but I go very nervous and did really speak much. I think she got uncomfortable and walked away. I made up for it but approaching her and speaking to her for a bit. One woman and I kept exchanging some glances and when ever we passed each other gave big genuine smiles...she even seem a but shy by it and would quickly look away and look back while smiling. She did have the same guy with her the whole time though so we never spoke at length.

I was in a much calmer mind set tonight too. I had two prolonged conversations with one of the artists. I first saw her outside and she gave me this great smile and she said HI to each other. Later she came in and passed with with a huge smile looking right in my eyes, and I responded in kind. Later we had our first conversation. The first one I was much more comfortable. It felt really good. I was nervous yet calm. My mind wasn't racing. I wasn't in complete flirt mood but it worked. I messed up a little bit but she had a smile on the whole time. Later we spoke again. She did tell me to visit her were she works. I have to speak to my friend who ran the event first before I do.

I caught my self fantasying about her but not aggressive porn thoughts; they were about bonding behavior like laughing, talking, the first touch and kiss, etc.